Week 9: WC Tank – “Achoo”

WC Tank (Wesley Charles Tank), avant-garde director, actor, and rapper, can now add “star of a musical” to his credits. We joined forces this past week and created a three act, thirteen-and-a-half-minute-long song, based on short scripts Wes wrote a while back. Nicole Mellas of Spencer McGillicutty added her lovely voice to the song as Wes’ lady counterpart.

Audio MP3

Achoo (Right click to download)
By Wes Tank, featuring Nicole Mellas and Charlie McCarron

Act I

And then there was you
The gosh of my gush
By floss or by brush
The pup of my slush

You
The source of my rush
How indulgent
You are captivating
I looked up the word “indulge” in the dictionary
And it was colloquial
To yield to the wishes of oneself or another
It wasn’t what you thought it would be
The exact opposite
Use indulge in a sentence
A hat tip to indulge a fellow pedestrian
No, no!
The wind indulges a toy boat’s tiny sail
Take me captive in your tiny boat
You might indulge me
You think that I am able to float
As boats may float?
No, as aeroplanes do

And then there was you
The gosh of my gush
My floss and my brush
The pup of my slush

Darling, are you strange?
Or are you estranged?
Which would you wish me to be?
You answer questions with more questions
That’s a calming strategy that proves rather boring, don’t you think?
Did you happen to visit
The produce aisle of the
Outdoor farmer’s market?
Yes
How large was their selection?
Copious
Did they have orahnges?
Yes
Und dee tomahta?
Ja
Chaquita Banana
Oui
Tofu?
Si
Spice?
No, no, no
Why no spice?
Because . . . .
Because
Ah-chooooooo

Act II

I love you, dove, oh yes
Please! Calm me down with a cool washcloth on my forehead
Bead me with it, that I may not overheat!
But dab, don’t scrub!
Oh!

The word is out, and the body sank like a stone tablet
Don’t diddle with doodles of great dawdling
Deliver, like a sweet goose with no feathers!
Please! I can’t say anything more
In other words, hush

Eye burn and the
No sleeps and the
Blister feets
He’s got the going aways and the
Tomorrow todays and the
Can’t waits
A beauty queen with a bag on her head smiles on the inside

I can’t breathe
Probably cause of all of the smog
But I’m going to attribute it to you
Because I’m feeling dissatisfied in this relationship
How could you do this to me?
Attributing the world’s problems to me
Without a care in the world?
Screw the world!
Your fly is down
The barn door’s open so the cows may mow through
How dare you stomp on the bubble gum streets
And breathe the hairspray air
That dogs once licked and parades once passed
And parrots . . . once breathed
What about the ozone layer?
Hark, a train travels quickly down a steep pass!
Perhaps we could be married in that train, someday
That’s out of the question
Out of what question!
There is no question!
I demand you marry me!
You must!
Oh silly boy, you should go eat a cake

He’s got the
Eye burn and the
No sleeps and the
Blister feets
He’s got the going aways and the
Tomorrow todays and the
Can’t waits
A beauty queen with a bag on her head smiles on the inside

She’s a lady friend with an eye for fashion
And a doubt to pass round the table
I’m sickened by my efforts
It’s all for nothing
No one will ever love me!
Look at how pitiful I am
Look! Look!
I am pitiful! Pity me now!
Look! Look!
I am pitiful! Pity me now!

Got the
Eye burn and the
No sleeps and the
Blister feets
He’s got the going aways and the
Tomorrow todays and the
Can’t waits
A beauty queen with a bag on her head smiles on the inside

I am a mule
A stupid, stupid fat mule!
Oh lord, spare me of this miserable person
You’re absolutely right!
What about the ozone layer?
You can hardly see it anymore
Humanity is a disease!
And I am the one to blame

Act III

It’s not poetical, something much more lackadaze
Something you can’t break off without smearing
We can become ambidextrous when we kiss
A hot commodity of errors and true humanness and peopledom
It’s no hazard, my billiard’s coupledom compels me to come forth
Well then, bring your guns and your horses, but do not swagger
How becoming of you my driftfulness

Pretty is as
Pretty does
Listless, adorn
You can human me to death, and I won’t budge but an inch
Please!
Penny for your budge?
There is nothing more that I am above

How do you figure, in this great amount of dark twinkling?
May I ask you, what is heaven doing in there, but practicing?
Hark, you’ve turned me
No less the crisp than the madrigal
How’s about a sweet one, right on the kisser
I shall not be compelled with you, yet
Perhaps another time in some far away living room?
Perhaps, then
What shall I bring?
A carefree attitude

Pretty is as
Pretty does
Listless, adorn
You can human me to death, and I won’t budge an inch
Please!
Penny for your budge?
There is nothing more that I am above

I am keen enough to witness that you’ll not be bludgeoned
Oh, you can hug me that I never lose my balance
Something sweet in that piety
Why do you freeze me?
Because a smile you’re wearing like saran wrap
Oh, I want to remember you, but should I forget
I am the belly button of the world, you said
The center of everything
Something you can’t wipe off without smearing

And then there was you
The gosh of my gush
My floss and my brush
The pup of my slush
The source of my rush
My indulgent, begrudgeoning crush
And then, there was you

Behind The Scenes

Wes is a shoo-in for two awards in this song a week challenge: longest song and longest distance driven to get here. He came all the way from Milwaukee! Wes and I met last year through Jason P. Schumacher’s film The Telephone Game, in which Wes plays an egotistical but loveable theater director. It seemed like I knew Wes before I met him, because I spent hours and hours editing his character’s dialogue. So it was pretty funny meeting him and seeing that he’s not “Marco”; he’s actually a very humble and awesome guy.

Wes pulled in to Minneapolis around 11pm on Friday night, and we knew we were going to be up late brainstorming. He had these three scripts ready, but not too many musical ideas yet. So we played around with them, and it was surprisingly easy once I came up with some chord progressions for Wes to sing over. Sometimes the first ideas are the best. We ended up getting the first two acts fully written in the wee hours of the night. I would have no idea how to translate un-rhymed, rhythm-less prose into song lyrics, but Wes really pulled it off.

We spent Saturday recording all of Wes’ vocals, while he was in town. Then Sunday morning Nicole came over to record, and wow, did she add a lot to the song! That afternoon Wes headed back to Milwaukee and Nicole and I headed off to a corn maze.

Listening back to Wes' vocals

I ludicrously thought I’d be able to finish the track in one weekend. Ha! Not with all the stuff I wanted to add to it (including some of my brother’s African drums for Act II). All in all, it was an epic undertaking even in one week. But I’m really happy with how it turned out, and I’m pretty sure we’ll be collaborating again somewhere down the line.

You can check out more of Wes’ music here.

Special thanks to @JeffreySchwinghammer for the awesome behind the scenes video and photos. More of his work can be found at JeffreySchwinghammer.com.

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